Halloweens In Review

October 2003

October 2004

October 2005

October 2006

October 2007

October 2008

Iron-Ons

Trying to save some cash I talked Leila into buying the $10 pair of jeans that were plain insteand of the $16.99 pair of jeans with a fancy belt and butterflys and glittery things. I did this by saying we can go to the craft store and get some iron-on embelishments thinking we would spend a dollar or two, and I might be able to start building up a reserve of this kind of thing for future use.

She found what she wanted- kittys and fish-- for $6.99. And now Nathan needed the doggies and bones too for a pair of his jeans at home for $6.99- so I not only saved $0 on Leila, I spent extra in the name of being fair and getting some for Nathan, not to mention time and gas. Next time, we are buying the $16.99 pair. And a note to the grandma's- Leila is a size six, not a seven- she is so thin and long it may be years before she actually fills in a seven waistband. By the time she outgrows the length, hopefully it will be summer and capris will be back in season.

They do both love thier unique jeans however and had fun placing the little emblishments exactly where they wanted them, and used every single item. Gotta love it:

Growing Baby

My unborn child is growing and kicking and definitely making her presence known- I often ask the kids to act out her movements- and they are very cute doing so. She is around 1 lb 5 oz and has the most beautiful profile. We got a head on shot of her at our last appointment and it looks like she is dressed up like a skeleton for Halloween! I am learning her sleeping schedule and am very interested to see if she keeps it up when she is finally here. Her lungs are getting ready for life outside of the lukewarm pool she is currently thriving in and her fat production kicks into high gear this week. At the end of this week if she decided to break free from her incubator she would have a 50% chance of survival, even though she would likely have some serious challenges to get thru. That blows my mind away- what a blessing to live in world that takes care of their tiniest inhabitants and give them a chance at life. Also she is working on developing her fingerprints and footprints. Her inner ear is developing too so she will likely know when she is upside down- something Leila and Nathan love, and we have no doubt she will love too.

I am over the halfway mark and am a bit surprised she will be here in less than 4 months. One more visit at 4 weeks, then I switch to every 2 weeks. Wow. Time flies when life gets crazy I guess. At my doctors appointment yesterday we found my placenta is movin' on up-- which is a good thing. I am feeling much better but definitely have my limits. I am having prep-contractions or braxton hicks- and normally these are painless, but I am definitely experiencing some discomfort(I won't say pain because having had real contractions before and know what real pain feels like). They gave me guidelines on when to call regarding my contractions. I can't decide if this pregnancy is actually harder than my previous pregnancies, or if I was either so distracted by working or my memory of the yucky parts simply faded away. Thanks to those of you who keep checking in and insisting on helping me. I am enjoying being taken care of, but don't often let people do so, so this has been a treat. I am finding I really love it when you don't give me a choice(Thanks Amy-- again!)

Things about being pregnant:
I LOVE feeling the baby move, I don't love getting kicked directly on the bladder- ping, ping, ping
I LOVE having my family feel the baby move, I don't love strangers touching my tummy or me
I LOVE not feeling like I need to restrict what I eat, I don't love heart burn or waking up in the middle of the night hungry
I LOVE no guilt with a middle of the night PB Sandwich or bowl of ice cream
I LOVE back rubs by my husband, I don't love feeling indebted to him to return the favor
I LOVE seeing my baby in the ultrasound screens, I don't love the internal ultrasound screens
I LOVE strong fingernails
I LOVE dreaming about and thinking about and loving my baby already.

Lines of cars

Oh what I would give to peek inside the mind of my darling boy. I have really enjoyed having one on one time with him while Leila is at school. I see him on a completely different level and am amazed at the workings of his beautiful mind.

He asked me the other day how people get under the ground after passing by the cemetery. I told him people get old or sick and die and then they are buried and they have a spot where family can visit and remember them. He then asked if there are monkeys under the ground too.

Every morning he asks me "What are we doing today Mommy?" and on the days when the answer is nothing, he seems completely satisfied.

He asks me about every sign we pass while driving. Finally today I was getting a bit tired of responding(And telling him that the signs say he is cute doesn't work for him) I told him he needed to learn to read so he could read the signs himself. He said "OK Mommy" but kept asking me what the signs say.

He is very sharing, most of the time. Today our friends Hunter and Paige came to visit and when I told him they were coming he immediately said: I will share my cars with Hunter. His teachers at his Nature Class also commented on his sharing attitude. I asked him to share some cheez-its with mommy and he said no. After a few more times I asked him to share them with the baby in mommy's tummy. He very willingly gave me one.

I asked him if he loved me: Yes. I asked him if I love him: Yes. I asked him if he loves cars: Yes. I asked him if I love cars: Ummm no mommy- you like Barbies.

Tonight he made his very own stoplight out of red, yellow and green legos. He is planning on using it in his room so he can control who comes in or not.

He is very creative spending his time and talents on building things. He loves stacking and lining up things. He loves order. In fact, I wonder if I see the beginnings of OCD on some days!
Check out his car lines:

I took the pictures on the carpet days before the pictures on counter not realizing I was capturing a trend.

Election Day- Not here soon enough!

Politics- ugh! Will Nov. 4th get here already?

I am not the most political person around. In fact, I might even say I am non-political. While I do believe voting is an important action on my part, I do not like discussing politics. I do not like listening to others discuss politics. I do not like making decisions when I feel either option is not optimal. I don't like making decisions when I am not completely sure what the question even is. There is so much crap flying around that the actual issues are no where to be seen. I don't trust politicians, because ultimately they are soliciting for votes and will likely say what needs to be said to earn those votes. It takes someone with true integrity to follow thru on their word and their commitments to the voters- most politicians are not that someone. Its not in their job description.

I do not belong to either major party and am registered independent not only because I am a very independent person, but also because at 18, who can commit to a political party? And I did register to vote at 18 and am proud I did so. I am still independent because while I am more on the conservative side, I am open minded or possibly even liberal enough that some of the more conservative matters don't feel right. I am concerned about who has my back and I could care less what party they are affiliated with. Me and my family are struggling thanks to the economic state, and I am not talking about the crash we had a few weeks back, but am talking about the general slow down we have seen over the past several months and year. Who is coming to my aid? Who will bail me and my husband out? Why can I not get these simple questions answered instead of getting distracted by all the other political issues that are going on? These other issues I am sure is as important is the economy, but feeling quite egocentric right now, I want to focus on what is right for my family, and how we are going to be taken care of by a government who claims to want to take care of its people.

I've been reading the voters pamphlet at night after the kids are down. You would think my insomnia issues would be taken care of by now, but no, I just think more. I often find myself thinking I understand the issue, then I read the supportive and opposition statements and begin to wonder what, if anything, these arguments have to do with the real bones of the matter. Is this each person interpretation? Did they have the measure explained to them by someone who wrote it? I also find myself looking at who is writing these statements- very suspicious when it is a person running for office with one, and then their party affiliations with several more. Makes me wonder if they are trying to pull something over on me, or are they really so passionate they feel the need to have so much said one way or the other. I like to think its passion. But the cynic in me doesn't quite buy that.

I feel pretty good about my votes. I have made most of my decisions, although this is like a test, the second I turn in my ballot, I am sure will have forgotten most if not all of my answers. Too bad I won't be able to discuss it with anyone. I am grateful I have the opportunity to vote- or even choose not to. I lived in a country where it was ILLEGAL to NOT vote! The fact this is our freedom to vote, and we are all part of this democracy by living in this country more people should vote, but I often wonder if we were forced if we would have a lot more write-ins, or maybe feel a little distrust in the outcome if someone is just punching because if not they will be fined, assigned community service or put in jail(though I doubt many actually go to jail).
I will be glad the commercials will be off the TV. I will be glad the phone calls will stop. I will be glad the mail will slow down, although my kids have enjoyed coloring or cutting up the mail that has come in- they love getting mail. Can't wait for 11-4-08. Look forward to seeing who will win President because we are in desperate need of change. The cynic in me doesn't think whoever is elected can make those changes in 4 years.

So its time for my civic duty again. My one vote really doesn't matter-- it is the act of my voting that matters. The act of your voting matters too..

Family for Sale

Have you ever had one of those days that seems to start out just fine... and suddenly it turns on you and nothing is going right? The logical side in me says to not worry about it, this happens from time to time. Or even lays blame on myself: what did I do to cause this unrest in my home. But how can an innocent Mom end up on everyone's bad side just by trying to care and love her family. How can caring and loving a family end up in such disasterous resutls? I am so over this. grrruuummmbbbbllleee


For Sale: Beautiful Husband, Amazing Daughter and Adorable Son. Usually the lights of my life. Will give a discount for all three....


(Wow, I feel better already- venting helps doesn't it? By the way, the daughter and son did come in while writing this to tell me they love me. I think they really do. I also think Husband put them up to it, which means he loves me too. The day is turning again as I write....)

Budgeting 101

Who wants to budget? Eeeewww... The brat in me just wants to spend and get what I want when I want it. But, as everyone knows, this is not only not possible, it is also not healthy. I grew up in a home that was middle class. We had everything we needed, and a lot of what we wanted- but not everything by far. There were several years while my dad was unemployed and our income was down and I know now my parents faced a lot of uncertainty and stress. But we as children were mostly shielded from those stresses because my parents didn't want us to worry. We were still provided for and our basic needs met. What a blessing.

When I enrolled at PCC at the tender age of 18 I got an application to my very first credit card. Now there is nothing like a credit card to make a teenager feel grown up and cool. I wasn't completely stupid and didn't run it up first thing, BUT, I did enjoy being able to have something when I really couldn't afford it and became quite accustomed to living that way. Credit was easy- I kept paying more than the minimum payments and my credit score and available balance soared. I got better and better jobs and adjusted my lifestyle accordingly, including my use of my credit cards(Sounds messed up, right?). So while everything in my life- my credit score, my income, my level of living went up, unfortunately so did my balance on my CC. But I was somewhat smart and financially savvy like my Dad raised me to be and I was able to keep that under control- somewhat- at least I never maxed a card out and have never had a collection call. Jeremy and I got together and a double income was a nice thing. Together we let our balances increase, but we both hated having this debt hanging over our heads. Twice we paid off rather large balances together and I am happy to say we have not used our credit cards in several years.

So, two and half years ago I was able to leave my job that paid me pretty well and take a job with my Dad's CPA business. While we work our bums off for about 3 1/2 months, we have it pretty easy the rest of the year, so my income dropped down to around 20% of what I was normally getting paid. This was OK- Jeremy and I knew it would meet our minimum needs, we could keep up with the house payments, and the reward was I could stay home with my children(which has no price), saving us money on childcare, commuting costs, and the other little things that come up while working(shopping at lunch was a big one). Now, I am sad to say, that income is gone too. Jeremy and I were aware this would eventually happen, but we aren't quite prepared for it like I would like us to be. So, it is time for a serious budget and learning to stick to the budget. This was and is hard for us, but so far so good.

First we needed to figure out where our money is actually going. I look at our bank statements and trying to categorize, even online, was a much too big of task. I subscribed to mint.com. They track and categorize our spending habits. The send notices when you get close to or exceed a limit in an online budget you set. It's very interesting information. I started this in the summer knowing while our expenses were higher with an out of country guest, we would still get an idea of the big unknown categories: Gas, groceries, misc shopping. This has helped give us a good idea of what we are spending so we can actually establish realistic budget amounts.

I did get paid in September, but we pretended I did not. We put that money in savings. In Sept. we needed some of it, and transferred it over, but are trying really hard to not use it in Oct. I started making grocery lists based on a weekly meal plan. I was shocked my first trip was $30 less. I didn't go off of that list, which isn't completely realistic because I like to stock up on things for our food storage(like if I had a jar of spaghetti sauce, I will buy two or three), but I know if I stick to a list of basics for the first pay day of the month(the one that includes our mortgage expense), I will be able to buy the extras the next trip. Hopefully. Jeremy started car-pooling almost from the beginning of getting this job- and that has helped with the climbing gas prices. I think before I turn up the heat and you are likely to see us wearing warmer clothes- I bought warm clothes for this time of year- I need to make use of them after all! I don't window shop. I can't go shopping without spending money, and I have found over the past several years I really don't enjoy myself shopping when I can't afford it or only allow myself to check out the clearance rack(though I love a good clearance deal). I do make sure we have money for fun stuff. We went to family swim last week for only $9 total- that was a totally cheap evening, and we all had a blast. We also have several things listed out that don't cost us much more than that, or anything at all.

Christmas is stressing me out a bit because while I do not believe that gifts are the reason for the season, I do enjoy giving things to people that have meaning and not worry about the costs. I want my kids to experience the magic of the holidays and the excitement of new toys. My extended family has avoided causing hardship for years by choosing a fun gift exchange with a $10 limit. I still usually get the kids something fun, but the exchange thing takes the pressure off. Last year I did get a part time job to help pay for Christmas, but that is not an option this year. I did notice several stores either bringing back lay-away or advertising it again(I have never used lay-away and am interested in figuring it out). I am still trying to find the ones in our area that offer it. I also am a bit crafty and plan to make some things for fun gifts and be satisfied with that. Its not about the amount you spend on a gift- its about the thought behind it. Right?

Now, I don't want my kids to worry about money. But, I do want them to be aware. If they want something and we don't have the cash on hand we tell them its not in the budget, and maybe we can wait for next pay-day. I see Leila thinking about money and she has even referenced our not doing something because we don't have money. She has also asked me when Daddy was getting paid again so we could do something fun(like go out to eat or something like that). I am hoping our honest approach will not stress her out but rather teach her we don't have to have everything right now, that we can save and plan for future purchases. We are creatures capable of waiting a week or two or even saving up for something that we want so badly. I have noticed after two weeks when we finally have the money, the desire is sometimes gone too. But she does like to get just like I do- this waiting for somthing you really really really want is a tough concept for me, a 32 year old. Its ever harder for a 5 year old. Yesterday, after asking for a trip to the dollar tree and my telling her no and explaining its not in our budget she thought about it for a bit and pulled out her beloved $2 from her little pink wallet. She gave $1 to Nathan so he could get something too. Very thoughtful. I did double check to make sure she really wanted to spend her dollars on this, and she was very confident that this was exactly what she wanted to do with her money. I put in my own $2 and bought us some pretzels and a soda to share at the park on our way home.

So, we have 1/2 a gallon of milk in the fridge, and don't get paid until the end of next week. Our balance on our checking account is alarmingly low. I will not have a problem transferring over some money so we can get our basics from the grocery store at the end of this week, but I know I can't buy more than our basic needs, which at this point is milk and pie crust(I have a major craving for pecan pie and am only missing the crust ingrediant and dont know how to make a successful one yet- and as any pregnant woman will tell you, a craving is a need, not a want!). We simply need to stay home and have fun and try not to waste what we do have- and I know we are capable of doing so. My friend Rebecca is into couponing and with coupons she is able to maintain a budget of $145 a month for all grocery, personal hygiene, paper products, etc. Wow! She does spend a lot of time organizing and searching out some of these deals, but if I can learn a tip or two from her and save even $75-100/month that would be great. I need to spend some time with her.

I feel now that my income is gone, I need to work even harder for a "hidden income" which is saving money and really knowing where we are spending our money. This adds yet another layer of pressure on me to make sure my home is running smoothly. And I do not enjoy this pressure. I have many wants- that include moving closer to Jeremy's work and upgrading homes, getting a massage or even a pedicure, going to Costco and stocking up on everything we might ever need just to have it, get more take-out dinners, buying some non-used maternity clothes, getting my kids anything they want for Christmas(Not necessarily in that order). BUT- these are wants and not needs. I feel confident we can live and be happy on Jeremy's salary alone. We won't have the extras, and won't be able to have fun weekends away or as many dinners out or fun shopping trips on things that aren't totally neccesary, but again- those are wants, not needs. Another month of sticking to this budget and I will feel much more secure in the way things are going. Learning to behave this way has leant me a feeling of increase control in what we do despite the fact we actually can't do as much. Its OK for us to tighten our belts once in a while- it makes me appreciate what I have even so much more. I do not need anything and everything the minute I see it.

So while I am now a full-time SAHM, I am also CFO of the Conser Home. Heavy titles, but important ones.